246 replies, Replies 1 to 10

Please do not PM, IM or Email me with support questions.

Uh...I think you may be lost? This is a website that offers peer support and general advice. It's not affliated with a business...it's just a social site.

- written
Time dilation is a lie.

I am apparently awfully late for this reply (I too, have been away for what apparently is now a million years) but this made me giggle. Although, personally, I am a few Jack Daniels in...and my math really sucks to the point of understanding physics.

This is honestly, my only understanding of physics...and I still don't understand it.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WIhu_IXXijQ

It's a good thing I'm only in love with a scientist (who isn't a Timelord), and not one myself.

Edit: This was meant to quote @DocteurRalph but apparently something went wonky and it didn't register...

Still, it stands.

- written
Religion is sick.

My Jewishness is from my father's side. In fact, my paternal grandfather was a holocaust survivor from Holland during WW2. After serving in Indonesia, he came home and joined the resistance groups. I am still following up on research that some of our family members may have died at Sobibor.

My mother's side of the family (this is a source of some amusement for me these days) is German. My maternal great-grandfather served in the German army. He was captured and spent 3 years in a Russian POW camp. My g-grandfather sadly, did not like Jews much...and he passed before my mother and my father met.

My maternal grandfather, however, did not hold the same the animosity towards Jewish people (he was only 8 when the war ended, and was 15 when he moved to Australia) and he and I remained close. My opa (my Dutch grandfather) did not speak English even after immigrating, so I spoke with him through my father translating. But my opi (German grandfather) did speak English, and had some years in raising me. My great uncle (opi's younest brother) has sadly expressed some pretty shameless views on how he views certain minority groups - and I have been advised to be careful what I say around times of my mother's side of family reunions because he's apparently...not the only one to have such antisemitic views.

It hits kinda close when you're made to "hush" about where you paternal side is really from among your own family... But it makes for some dark humor when I think of the fact that my Nazi-supporting great-grandfather would be somewhat horrified to know that his granddaughter married a Jew...

In addition, my maternal grandparents, one of their daughters and my cousin (my aunt's youngest child) became Jehovah's Witnessess in 1991. I was about 5 at the time. Not only has my cousin told me to my face, "well, we (JW's) were targeted in WW2 as well!" but my own aunt only about two years ago during a visit and a casual conversation went "I don't hate anyone...except Jews, but they killed Jesus", then LOOKED directly at me, said "sorry but it's true." and I'm just made to sit there on the floor in front of my mother and my grandparents and just...take it.

I was kind of shocked that when I tried to speak out and correct the LONG-incorrect blame (it was the Romans...not us. We didn't have the power. We were under Roman occupation.) but I was more surprised when my grandmother came to my defense/back-up. And this is the same grandparent that expressed sadness over the fact that I didn't believe in "The Trilogy" so I wasn't going to "be with them in the New System."

But I think I'd digressed a bit - which is stupid of me, because I don't even know if this reply will ever be seen by you at this point. This site is getting more and more like a ghost town...and you quite possibly have left it, or have even forgotten this post if you are a regular member (you posted anonymously, so it is hard to tell if you're still someone around here).

But basically...my amusement was that, from your initial post, I could tell that your attitudes toward religion or faith as a whole seemed to be mostly toward those of maybe a Christian-influenced society, or just proselytizing-based faith as a whole.

As a side-note; the incredibly insulting "Jews For Jesus" or "Messianic Jews" fall under those categories too. Because they are sadly, NOT supported by Judaism. They are considered Christians who seek to convert Jews, or mislead people in what Judaism actually is.

But to sum up, and in semi-direct mention of your penultimate sentence, Jews are considered a minority in most places of the western world. Just due to the fact that Christianity is the majority and more widely accepted stance of mainstream religion. We even detest the use of the term "Judeo-Christian" because we do not wish to be associated with their justification of constant hate and judgment of how other people live.

But of course, we also run into the conspiracy theories that have followed us for over 2000+ years. I'm supposed to apparently be hiding horns in my hair, or control/own a bank (I wish) and tell the governments what to do. And then there's the more modern idea that Jew = Pro-Israel, which is a whole other seperate issue. I do very much encourage the ridiculous idea that we have a secret space laser though... it's cathartic and entertaining to think we have a coping/revenge mechanism to fall back on. Lol.

A few Chanukahs ago, I had someone scream at me from their car as I was sitting outside with my Chanukiah lit in the window facing the street (as is tradition; to celebrate and show that we embrace that we are given the freedom to observe our faith that was once attempted to be silenced) "****Fuck Israel". I'm in Australia...I've never stepped foot into Israel, and I've been a pacifist since my pre-school days.

So yes, I do do wish there was more people in the world who would behave and treat others in such a way that it wouldn't harm others. There's actually a Jewish concept of it, called "Tikkun Olam" which means to "repair/heal the world" in the idea of fairness, equality, and social justice. It's there to be non-judgemental, based on individuality and embracing the good in all people and things.

A while back, I had a conversation with someone in Indonesia who was saying that many ideas of Hinduism and Buddihism could also relate to Judaism. I don't know much about the former myself but from what I do know; it might not be that far-fetched of a comparison.

Anyway...whether this reaches you again or not - I thought perhaps in some small way, writing this out and adding my reply to this post might achieve something in someway. Even if it is just further insight to someone else who might come across it. Personally, I have always been someone for insightful topics like this...even if sometimes I might shy from them due to my anxieties and general fear of reactionary hostility.

- written
Religion is sick.

I'm going to half to split this reply into two parts, apparently...because I've been having a couple of drinks tonight, and I apparently talk/type too much. Lol.

But to start...

Anonymous wrote:
If your faith allows for your to believe as you wish without affecting anyone else that's great!

I do for some reason have the idea somehow, and not counting it as fact, perhaps you can even clear it up for me: I know nothing of the Torah, I just assume every faith has it's 'sacred texts' but I have the impression that a lot of the Torah is similar in context and views of the Old Testament teachings I'm familiar with does it not?

If that's true, you've managed to do a lot of interpretation for the better. If taken literally I don't believe you would have come to the same conclusions you have personally.

...Anyone who can do that, I believe would be considered a minority in any country. We certainly need more who can do what you do.

I do not know if you're still around here - I know that your reply and question to me was over a year ago now - but I've been away from the site a bit and only just recently read this reply while going back through my notices. So sorry about that!

To try and answer your question though (if you see it, if if it still matters) The Torah is what most would refer to as "The Old Testament", yes. But...only the first five books. Genesis, Exodus, Leviticus, Numbers and Deuteronomy.

However; to begin to explain a bit further, it's not referred to as "the old testament" by Jews because that would imply it has been replaced. And in Judaism, anything beyond the Tanakh (the Torah + the books following up to Malachi) does not exist/matter to us. That's a bit more complication to expand on at this time, though.

But, that in many Jewish views, there were many mistranslations of the Tanakh when non-Jews began to transcribe them. This occured mostly due to the scribes who were paid/ordered to make the translations being ordered to change words or could not properly directly translate from the original contexts. Think of it like the earliest version of the game "Telephone" to put it simply. And most of the translations were ordered/done so as to include it into the new texts that would eventually be put together with "The New Testament". Those translations, were demanded by non-Jews or would-be Christians.

That being said; the texts of the orginal Tanakh were never meant to apply to a person who was not Jewish. So Christians who refer to scriptures within them (specifically, they love to bring up Leviticus) and use it for justifications of telling what others should/should not do are doing so incorrectly. In Judaism, Hashem (our informal word for G-d) is only really concerned what we do, and those who aren't Jewish...to put it in the easiest way, are getting off pretty easy.

It's the same sort of thing behind the whole concept/terminology of "The Chosen People." It's misunderstood that it makes us sound like we feel we are more important, or in more favour. But I have an analogy to explain it a bit better.

To put it into a bit of a wider perspective (and to explain a bit more before I get into the analogy part); There are 613 commandments that we as Jews, are expected to follow. Also, to keep in mind, we do not believe in Hell in the same sense as Christianity (eternal torture, fire and brimstone, etc). "Hell" or (more directly)"Sheol" is a transliteration for "grave". Christianity in fact, is the one who has the concept of original sin...we do not. We also, do not view Satan as a fallen angel, but as an angel who has a specific role still...as is doing what is asked/ordered of him. In Judaism, only humans were granted freewill...angels were not. So it would be impossible for one to be able to betray and turn against Hashem.

That being said, there is not a definitive (or common agreement) of an afterlife. It's mostly understood in Judaism that we have just one life. And no one, not even Jews, are above anyone else in this life. If there is something else after this, it is not based on faith, or even the level of it...but how we live here and now. So no, a person doesn't have to be Jewish, or even religious. For those who do hold the idea of an afterlife, it is considered that we are judged by our actions, and our hearts.

So, to put that in the analogy; there is a house with 613 windows (613 representing the full total of commandments/laws in the Torah and Tanakh as a whole). Jews ("The Chosen People") are expected to wash all 613 of those windows. At the completion...we get paid $1000 and taken out for ice cream. Non-Jews, are expected to wash 7/10 of those windows. And at completion, get $1000 and taken out for ice cream.

The 7/10 comparison is based on what's considered the "Ten Commandments" or what's considered the "7 Noahide laws"). But regardless of what you'd call them...it's still the same basic principle.

Non-Jews (in my way of putting it) get the easy stuff. "Chosen" just basically means more is asked of us. Like, for instance, we're the ones who are forbidden to do any form of work on Shabbos (but many of us ask for assistance or "employ" a non-Jew to do small tasks for us, such as lighting a flame to heat a home, for example).

Judaism as a whole is considered what's called a "closed religion". Based on several factors. One, being that at its core, it is an ethnoreligion and is passsed down through generations. Two, that faith is strictly very personal, and therefore proselytizing is strictly forbidden (besides, a person being non-Jewish is not seen as someone "bad" or "not worthy"). And three, traditions or laws that Jews follow are only ever expected and asked of Jews to observe. Such as eating kosher, blowing the shofar on Rosh Hashana, or any laws we break, or hurt we cause ourselves, or others (Jews or non-Jews) that we are to atone for on Yom Kippur.

Like I tried to sort of bring across in previous replies - Judaism is pretty liberal in most contexts. It believes in "live and let live" and to put more of a modern spin on it, "what YOU do, is your own business. Just please, don't hurt anyone while doing it."

A lot of the modern, western world has been shaped by Christianity, and I pressume that your experiences have that influence behind them. Including your frustrations and your anger. And you are indeed entitled to them! I completely understand them. That is why my initial reaction was to laugh. Because; I get it. I get the frustration and where you are coming from.

- written
Hello, HelpQA~~I was a member of the original Help.com years ago and a member of the QA as well.

Hey! I think I remember you a bit. Or at least the name rings a bell.

Yeah, it's very quiet around here these days. But some of the older members are still floating around, as you can probably see!

- written
Religion is sick.

Well, I have to admit, I didn't expect a well-thought out response considering how your post started off...

But to make things clear, I'm not in the USA, which I'm assuming you're from based on some of your clarifications. So again, my belief in higher power really isn't the US' business, since I don't/can't vote on their politics. And if they still think it is their business on who someone prays to on the other side of the world... that's kinda creepy and a bit stalkerish.

I normally do not even state my religion here, but I'll make a rare exception considering you actually asked, and for the sake of discussion; I'm Jewish. I'm actually a pretty laid back and less restricitive Jew. I'm also LGBTQIA. I'm an individual, and what I hold as my personal views morally, socially, and even politically - my faith has no bearing on them whatsoever. Although, interestingly enough, a lot of my personal views are actually in line with my faith, absolutely by coinicidence.

Does my faith speak of those of the same genders not being equal or refusing to acknowledge their love and wish to union with one another? Nope. Despite what mistranslations may claim. Does it seek equal rights for all people? Yes it does. In fact, I wasn't raised within the culture due to my father being an Athiest Jew, and only sought to deassimilate within the last decade. My father was in fact, very political (still is, as far as I know - we haven't spoken in years) and my early childhood consisted of being very active in the political community myself - I've even ran for local office.

To condense what I'm trying to explain, is that my morals, my social views and my willingness to try and help those around me, is not faith-based. My faith is based on what is expected of me more than what I should expect from others. I am actually a pretty liberal person, politically....but then, I find that Judaism since I have been studying it more and more, seems to be pretty liberal too.

With the unfortunate exception of discovering that my Rabbi has turned out to be a Trump supporter. But then, he's also a Zionist, and I am not, so...

- written
Have you ever cut off a family member.

Sadly, several.

My father being the most severe case. Abusive, narcissitic, toxic and just something I do not need, want, nor deserve in my life. If he wants to spend his life being a miserable c*nt, that's on him, and he did it to himself. The rest of his family has done away with him too. He's going to die very lonely.

An uncle - who basically cut off the rest of us for his toxic wife. And the fact that his father (my grandfather) has been struck down in recent years from lung cancer, dementia and parkinson's and he's done nothing to even try to be there as his father dies... his siblings aren't all that happy with him either. I've had to get to know my cousins via Facebook - I've never even met the youngest and she's almost an adult now.

A cousin... but that's a complicated and not really "permanent" thing. But our personalities do not mesh at all. He's an angry person to the point he's violent...and the views that we hold would probably get us into more fights every 20 minutes with each other than I can handle. He's an active meth addict on top of all of that, and I don't like that he's openly (and defensively) friends with one of my rapists. So...cut off he was.

The last one breaks my heart a bit actually. I had some struggles growing up and he was like a big brother to me. Especially since I was practically raised by his mum. But...struggles in his own life changed him significantly, and he let them rule his nasty behavior. I no longer feel safe around him, and so I keep him at a far far distance.

- written
Religion is sick.

As someone who is vaguely religous, this actually made me laugh.

Because I never once have claimed that I'm at all sane. I have self-inflicted scars and medical records to prove it.

The difference being, my being religious doesn't effect anyone but myself. I'm not someone to think what I believe, or don't believe...should be the standard of how someone else lives their life. So why does what I believe, any business of yours?

- written
Straight/Bi men: Have you ever met a woman that made you have trouble trusting women generally or wish you weren't into women anymore?

I've sadly had trouble trusting men most of my life, just due to my experiences with about 97% of them. I basically feel like the character Carin from Patch Adams...almost every man I've come across since the age of 6 - hasn't really given me much respect or allowance to my own autonomy.

It may have somewhat contributed to the fact that I discovered in my mid-20's that I'm asexual too, and why I'm pushing 40 and still haven't had consensual ***sex. I've wanted to, but it requires a lot more trust, and when former childhood friends, and even family members have broken and betrayed that trust...it makes it all the more difficult.

But I think recently, I may have found a good one, and he hasn't turned out to be sexually deranged domestic violence type...at least not yet. Lol. So I'm holding out for hope, and thankfully, he knows the baggage I carry already But we've known each other since high school 20 years ago and just reconnected years later, so I guess that helps? Probably the only decent guy I met in that entire town too, but then the bar's not real high.

- written
I truly equate time wasters the same with murderers.

If slow walkers and stop'n'talkers in grocery stores count as time wasters, I completely agree!

I just want to get through, grab my stuff and get out. But then you have the ones you're stuck behind because they've decided to stop in the middle of the aisle and chat to a friend they run into...or leave their trolley and walk 5 metres away to get what they want, without realizing that someone behind them can't squeeze through their abandoned trolley and a display set up, ugh...

And the ones who treat shopping like a gentle stroll, I want to ram my trolley into the back of their knees. It's fine if I can dodge and weave through them...if there's enough room, but then I somehow get dirty looks because I'm in a hurry to get passed them.

Do they think I have hours to spend at the store and I don't have something else I need to do?

- written